those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
