So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
