so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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