people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
