Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
