woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize