he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
