You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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