Just took my morning after pill in the library
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
