Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Farmville is her only friend.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
