too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
