Quick, to the slutcave!
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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