Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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