So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
