my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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