Do vagina's smell?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
