There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
