I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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