Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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