As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
