Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
