a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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