lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
