how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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