I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
