i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
