I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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