Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
