Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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