I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
