Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
