i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
