Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize