How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
