Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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