Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
