Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
