the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
