You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
He kissed a someone with a penis
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
