Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
