I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
