What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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