Sry I called you an 8
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
