Quick, to the slutcave!
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
