Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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