Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I got inside last night via doggy door
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
