"it" just moved
I just cut my nipple shaving
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Your cock deserves a montage
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
