just come out here and I will go home with you...
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
