have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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