Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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